Smiling Bella

And the heavens opened and there was much rejoicing

noreply@blogger.com (Bella) — Wed, 05 Nov 2008 23:09:00 +0000

Yesterday, I went on an epic quest in search of the elusive orthodontic wax.

I was positive that I had seen it on a particular shelf in a drug store the last time I was there. I went to a different location of the same chain, only to find they didn't carry it.

I then drove all the way across town to the original location where I'd seen the wax, expecting that it would be exactly where it was just a few days ago, but it wasn't there, either.

I begged the store clerks to help me find it, but they confirmed the fact that it wasn't there. I soon realized that I was so desperate for the stuff that I had actually been hallucinating it was at the store. They don't carry it, and hadn't carried it for years. It was all just a beautiful, beautiful dream created by my wax-deprived mind.

It's kind of sad, really.

I was almost in tears when I realized that you can't really buy this stuff in stores, at least not in my city. Also, my orthodontist doesn't have an office in town - he just comes in on weekends every few weeks, so it's not as though I could get some from him.

And then one of the clerks suggested I go to the dentist's office in the mall to see if they had any.

Good idea! I ran there and begged the clerk at the desk for some, conveniently not mentioning that I was not at all a patient at that office.

She wasn't sure if they had any, but after much searching in a back room, she came out with a plastic baggie with about a lifetime supply of the stuff. I almost kissed her, I was so relieved.

And then I mushed a whole bunch of that stuff into my wires and cried tears of joy.

Sigh.

Life is good.

Damn you, Four Months Ago Bella!

noreply@blogger.com (Bella) — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 18:20:00 +0000

One of my new brackets is rubbing against the inside of my upper lip, creating a very raw bump that catches on the metal every time I talk, smile, eat and...do just about everything.

Last night, I tore apart my purse, bathroom, bedroom searching for that little magical box of orthodontic wax. The fact that I couldn't find it anywhere drove me absolutely nuts, because I'm the Queen of knowing exactly where all of my stuff is at any given time. It's my thing.

As I obsessed over where it could possibly be, I suddenly got a very distinct image in my mind of me tossing the box in the garbage four months ago and saying smugly to myself, "Hah! I'm never going to need that again!"

Right now, I would be quite happy to smack Four Months Ago Bella across her braceless face.

(In case you were wondering: Yup, braces + raw lip = cranky Bella.)

Ask Bella: Fuzzy teeth

noreply@blogger.com (Bella) — Mon, 27 Oct 2008 22:03:00 +0000

Q: I have having trouble with oral health. Did your mouth feel nasty after your surgery??? My tongue is white and I am trying to drink water but my mouth feels gross. I had surgery on my top jaw and a huge metal splint put in my mouth that has to stay there for six weeks until the next surgery. I try to brush my teeth (the bottom anyway) but things still are not great. Is this to be expected? I want to know if its normal or if I am doing something wrong.

A: Oh, how I remember the grossness of my mouth post-surgery, and I was only wired shut for two weeks. The first week was alright, but by the second week, I could definitely feel a fuzz growing on the back of my lower teeth. When I got the wires off, my teeth were brown. It was absolutely disgusting.

Gee, thanks for taking me back to those oh-so-happy times :)

I actually think that was the worst part of the surgery for me. Not being able to get the crud off my teeth with all that metal in my mouth, so I do feel for you. The only advice I can give you is to keep doing what you're doing (brushing the bottom teeth), and also get a Water Pik to try and get some jet action around that splint (being careful to aim it away from any stitches, etc.) and do lots of mouth rinses with salt water and/or alcohol-free mouthwash.

And then accept the fact that probably no matter what you do, your mouth will be gross and fuzzy for a few weeks, because that's the way it goes. (I did all of these things and still had fuzzy, brown teeth after two weeks, but you gotta at least try, right?)

Once you're done doing what you gotta do, take some time to fantasize about the moment when you get to brush away all that fuzzy sludge with a toothbrush until you wear its bristles down to nubs.

Aaaaaahhhh. Better than porn.

(I bet it's even better than German orthodontic fetish porn. Just guessing.)

Seriously, good luck. This sucks, but it will all be worthwhile once it's all over.

Choo chooo

noreply@blogger.com (Bella) — Fri, 24 Oct 2008 21:29:00 +0000

It's true: the train tracks, they are back on.

As my orthodontist was placing them back on, he commented, "I don't even remember the last time I've had to re-place brackets because I needed to fix something."

So, I've gone from the patient who had her braces off after surgery in record time, to the only one in recent memory who has had hers put back on.

Oh, how the mighty have fallen.

Ask Bella: Changes in appearance

noreply@blogger.com (Bella) — Wed, 22 Oct 2008 22:55:00 +0000

Q: I had upper and lower jaw surgery (turbinates removal & genioplasty as well) about 2 1/2 weeks ago. Like most people, I did this surgery for purposes of function and not appearance. I loved my appearance - I loved how dainty I thought I looked.

While I don't think my reaction a week post-op is much indication of how I will feel forever...after most of the swelling had gone down and I could tell what I would look like, I was devastated. I didn't recognize myself. I had this dysmorphic type of reaction to the results of my surgery and I couldn't stop staring at what I saw as the destruction of my appearance. Even 2 1/2 weeks out, the steroids have worn off, I'm not on meds, I'm getting normal sleep, I'm not in much pain at all....yet my reaction to the alteration of my appearance still stays.

Have you received emails from other people that have had this reaction? Do you know how they overcame it?

A: I'm so sorry you're going through such a hard time. Your email made me want to reach out and hug you.

My surgery wasn't nearly as extensive as yours, so I can't speak to the dysmorphic reaction to your reflection from personal experience; however, I have read on message boards about other people who have had similar reactions to yours.

And, really, who can blame you? We all identify with our outer appearance - you've lived within this skull and skin your entire life and then one day, suddenly, you look in the mirror and don't recognize the person staring back at you? That is a huge shock to the senses, psyche, and identity. How are you supposed to just accept that you look completely different in just 2 1/2 weeks?

Let yourself mourn your old appearance. It's okay to feel sad because you have lost something that was a big part of who you are. But at the same time, try to find things that you like about your new appearance. Take a good look. Check out your profile. (I know I always hated mine because my weak chin made my nose look bigger. Now, it's more in proportion, which I like a lot.) Make a list of what you like and focus on that as much as you can. Because the reality is that this is what you look like now, so you need to find ways to look at yourself in the mirror and like what you see, after the surgery.

I think time will help, focusing on the positive will help, and then if you still feel that things aren't where you would like them to be, talking to a therapist would be the next step.

When I'm frustrated and upset about the fact that I still don't feel like myself these days (I'm struggling with a lot of fatigue, even after my post-surgery anemia has gotten better), my boyfriend always says to me, "You're pretty hard on yourself, you know." It makes me realize that I do put a lot of pressure on myself to be perfect, to be healthy, to be this super achiever and that sometimes, I just need to be good to myself and say, "It's okay if it's not happening as fast as I want. I'll get there" and just give myself a break for once.

Two and a half weeks is not that long. Even if everything seems to be going swimmingly, you've had major, major surgery where they took a bone saw to your face and rearranged your bones. That affects your body and your mind and your spirit in a big way. So, don't pressure yourself to be totally healed and accepting of everything just yet.

Just be good to yourself. I hope everything goes well for you.

*To ask Bella a question about her jaw surgery, email her at smilingbella at gmail dot com or leave a comment on this post. Go ahead: ask away!!

An apple a day

noreply@blogger.com (Bella) — Sat, 18 Oct 2008 02:11:00 +0000

Even though I have had my braces off since early July, it took me until this week to eat an apple without cutting it into sections first.

I think I avoided it for so long because I had a hard time believing my jaw would be strong enough to eat a whole apple out of my hand instead of sliced up on a plate.

When I finally got around to it, it was as though I had forgotten how to eat an apple. I bit in with my top teeth and tried to pull of a chunk with them, as I used to do with my overbite. It wasn't working. And then I discovered that I had to move my lower lip out of the way and my lower teeth could actually dig into the skin, too.

Then, the coolest thing happened - I got a full bite out of the juicy flesh! And it was awesome!

I have been gorging myself on sweet organic apples ever since, and every bite fills me with a sense of marvel.

It took me this long to figure it out...and guess what?

My upper braces are going back on tomorrow.

8 months post-surgery

noreply@blogger.com (Bella) — Sat, 11 Oct 2008 17:18:00 +0000

It's hard to believe eight months has gone by since my surgery. It feels like forever, making me wonder if it ever happened in the first place. But I need only look in the mirror to see my new chin and smile to remind myself that yes, it really did happen.

In good news, I went to my physiotherapist yesterday and we got up to 45 mm for the first time! I'm almost at the end of my range of motion, so that's incredibly exciting. I still have some work to do, though, because my muscle memory is interfering with my mouth opening properly.

When I open my mouth wide, my jaw swings to the right, because the muscles are remembering the way my jaw was positioned for 32 years (it was a bit asymmetric before). So, I have to start doing exercises using my hands to guide my jaw into the proper position while opening my mouth.

I've also noticed the muscle thing when I smile. My smile is still somewhat crooked because my muscles have been compensating for the asymmetric jaw. I have to start taking time each day to practice smiling in the mirror so my muscles can relearn what to do.

I have to spend hours in front of a mirror smiling at myself? How tragic.

In other good news, I have full feeling in my chin now - no more numbness! If I pay super close attention and use a very light touch across my chin and lower lip, I can tell that the feeling isn't 100% back yet, but it's barely noticeable (we're talking 99.999876%). There are still improvements every day and I am positive that I will get to 100% in the next few months.

In the not-so-good news department, I am one week away from getting my top braces back on to close a couple of gaps that opened up at the back.

Until then, I will be eating popcorn, corn on the cob, apples, and other crunchy "forbidden" foods to my heart's content!

Chow down!

Ask Bella: Healing time

noreply@blogger.com (Bella) — Sun, 05 Oct 2008 03:33:00 +0000

Q: I'm 20 years old, work and go to school full-time, and I'm having my upper jaw advanced, lower jaw set back, and maxi expansion. my case is pretty bad, to the point where my insurance is covering 100%! I will be ready to get my jaw surgery in April. My ortho's assistant told me that from what she's observed with other patients, I could do the surgery over Easter break (one week) and be back at school after that. I nodded politely, but in my head I was thinking, "Uh, no." From all the research I've done it seems like you need at least a few weeks. I was thinking about taking online courses next semester so I could get the surgery in April and not have to spend the summer healing. From your experience, how long would you say I should expect to be out of school/work?

A: When your ortho assistant told you that you'd be back at school in a week, did you happen to notice a crack pipe nearby? Or perhaps some telltale trail marks on her arms and a glazed look in her eyes? Because she had to have been on something to say that.

Seriously. That is nuts.

I only had my lower jaw done and I was off work for a month, and I wish I would have taken six weeks off. My surgeon had told me that I would be fine to go back to work after two weeks, but he might have been smoking the same thing that your ortho's assistant was, because there was no way I would have been able to go back in that time frame.

It wasn't so much the pain from the surgery, but the exhaustion of my body trying to heal and also not being able to get enough calories in that did it for me. Granted, I am 12 years older than you, so you could heal faster and have more energy, but for the first month after surgery, I had to take a two to three-hour nap after I did just about anything. Even something simple like tossing a load of laundry in the washer knocked me out for a few hours afterward. Ditto for when I had to put stuff in the dryer.

Because my surgeon had told me that two weeks off would be enough, I only asked for a month off work, and felt that I was being indulgent taking that. In reality, I needed more time to rest and going back to work that soon probably set my healing back awhile.

I think it's a great idea to take some online courses and then you can take things at your own pace and not worry about rushing yourself to get back to school/work before you're ready. Just listen to your body and do what's right for you.

Best of luck to you!

*To ask Bella a question about her jaw surgery, email her at smilingbella at gmail dot com or leave a comment on this post. Go ahead: ask away!!

Before, during and after pictures

noreply@blogger.com (Bella) — Sat, 27 Sep 2008 14:48:00 +0000

I finally got my "after" pictures taken at my last surgeon visit, so if you would so kindly ignore the bags under my eyes, here you go! (The order goes: before braces, before surgery (with braces), and after surgery and braces removal.) Enjoy!

And here are my teeth, pre-braces, pre-surgery and post-braces and surgery:

Brace yourself...again

noreply@blogger.com (Bella) — Sat, 27 Sep 2008 01:53:00 +0000

So, I went to my orthodontist for a follow-up appointment and guess what?

I have to get my upper braces put back on.

I wish I were messing with you and there was a really awesome punch line to insert right here, but that's not the case.

There are some spaces between my upper molars that opened up these past few months. My ortho had closed some gaps a few weeks before the braces came off and I guess they didn't "set" in their new positions and even wearing the retainers as instructed (religiously, I swear!) did not keep them from moving back.

My teeth, to anyone around me, look perfect, because you can't see the gaps. But I can feel them, particularly because anytime I eat anything, it gets impacted in the spaces and drives me absolutely crazy.

If I were only doing this for aesthetic reasons, I suppose I could live with it. But the whole point of getting the braces and surgery was to have a functional bite. I'm not willing to compromise on that. And after everything I've been through this year, this is not that big of a deal in the grand scheme of things. I imagine it will only be a month or so and then I'll be done. Again.

So, here we go.

Bring on the tire tracks!

Sigh.

(On the plus side, I don't get them on until late next month, so there is lots of time for me to eat corn on the cob until then. Yay!)

Ask Bella: Jaw Surgey Blogging 101

noreply@blogger.com (Bella) — Sun, 21 Sep 2008 05:20:00 +0000

Q: How do I go about creating a blog? I was really thinking that writing about and sharing my experience could not only help others, but really help me to get through this as well. Not to mention, hopefully meet people going through the same thing. I have never done a blog before and I am not too sure how to get it set up so that it's on a site with other jaw surgery candidates/patients, etc. I really do not want to have the entire world be able to view it, just the people who are going through the same things.

A: Thanks for the email. I'm glad you're thinking about a blog - I know it really helped me make my decision to read about other people's experiences, so the more information that's out there for people, the better, I say.

There are two blog platforms that I'd recommend: Blogger http://blogger.com/ and Wordpress http://wordpress.com/. Both are user-friendly and straightforward and have templates for you to choose from for your blog layout, so there's no HTML coding or anything like that. And they're both free, which is important as well.

I've been thinking about your question about privacy and only having your blog open to other people in the jaw surgery community. That's difficult to do, because most people would find you from Google searches, so if you had your blog password protected, those people would likely not request the password - they would move on to another search result that wasn't protected. Blogger only allows you to password protect the entire blog while Wordpress lets you password protect specific posts, so that might be an option for you if you wanted to keep certain things private.

But the way I see it is this: don't put anything on the Internet that you don't want everyone reading. If it's truly private, don't put it out there. Only write about things you feel comfortable about. Use a pseudonym and an email address specific to the blog (i.e. Gmail, Hotmail, Yahoo, etc.) to protect your identity. If you're really concerned, don't post any pics of your whole face, either. Or you could always password protect your pictures. But again, I wouldn't post anything expecting that the password protect is totally secure (people could always give your password to other people, etc.)

To connect with other jaw surgery folks, start reading their blogs and commenting on them with your blog address. Link to the blogs you read and let them know you linked to them - they may link back, which would build your readership. Leave your blog address up on the jaw surgery message boards and link lists. You'll build a community around you quickly. I wouldn't worry too much about other people not in the jaw surgery community finding your blog (particularly if you're not using your real name or email, etc.), because people aren't going to be looking for your blog unless they're going through the same thing.

Yes, there are some freaks out there. I would make sure you have a stat counter on your site (http://www.statcounter.com/). This will allow you to see how many hits are on your blog each day and what search terms people are using to find it and the country/URL they are accessing your site from. It should be pretty straightforward to install it - it's just a code you paste into your template and you're set.

The stat counter is how I found out that 1,500 German orthodontic fetishists came to my blog in a three-day period. It was a little weird to know that, and there wasn't much I could do about it, unless I wanted to shut down the blog. Though, for the record, they never left any comments or emails. I think they just like to look at women with braces. And then they went away.

So, if you're putting your information out there, you do have to prepare yourself for the fact that there may be people using it in ways that you didn't intend. Someone may leave a rude comment, too, which could be very hurtful. (And...delete! The comment, not the blog!)

From all the emails and comments I've gotten these past few months I've had the jaw surgery blog, I really have helped a lot of people by telling my story and sharing details about my recovery. Other people helped me, and now I'm helping people. It's karma. And if a few people are freaks, so be it. I'm not going to let them get in the way of what I feel is important.

*To ask Bella a question about her jaw surgery, email her at smilingbella at gmail dot com or leave a comment on this post. Go ahead: ask away!!

Ask Bella: Ya gotta sing, sing

noreply@blogger.com (Bella) — Thu, 18 Sep 2008 01:17:00 +0000

Q: I had jaw surgery six weeks ago and my jaw muscles feel terribly weak. It's hard to enunciate. I have this brand new speech impediment. It makes singing incredibly frustrating and discouraging. Have you been able to resume singing yet? Are you happy with your voice? Any changes?

A: I know what you mean about the speech impediment. For the first while, it hurt to touch my teeth together, so I started avoiding it; after awhile, it became a habit, so my enunciation wasn't so hot. Everyone seemed to think I was saying something naughty when I wasn't!

It was something I had to work on. It is weird to have your teeth in a different place after decades of them being in another position. It takes time to adjust. Now, I would say that my enunciation is better than it was before!

I auditioned for a musical revue at the end of August (six and a half months post-surgery) and have been rehearsing this month. I'm amazed at how much easier it is to sing now. Instead of having to thrust my jaw forward and do all kinds of jawnastics to enunciate properly as well as create enough space in my mouth for my voice, I am now able to just open my mouth and let my voice come out.

Is this really how normal people sing? Is it that easy?

I also really like the placement of my voice now. Before, I would struggle to ensue my voice was placed at the front of my mouth; now, it's just there. And I don't get headaches after singing, because it doesn't put a strain on my jaw to do it.

It feels really, really good. I can't wait to start really singing again and see what else is in store.

*To ask Bella a question about her jaw surgery, email her at smilingbella at gmail dot com or leave a comment on this post. Go ahead: ask away!!

Audio clip of blog post on the radio

noreply@blogger.com (Bella) — Sat, 06 Sep 2008 19:25:00 +0000

Below is the audio clip of my blog being read by host Kelley Jo Burke on the CBC Radio Saskatchewan program, SoundXChange. I actually figured out how to embed it on this site, which is no small feat! Enjoy! [You do need to have Real Player installed to hear the file, which you can download for free here.]

Blogging killed the radio star?

noreply@blogger.com (Bella) — Thu, 04 Sep 2008 21:34:00 +0000

No, it most definitely did not. In fact, while there was some tension between them at first, after a few belts of scotch, they ended up telling each other their life stories, eventually collapsing in a drooling heap of exclamations of "I love you, man."

"What are you getting at, Bella?" you're all thinking. Yeah, I get that a lot.

Well, guess what? A monologue I wrote based on my post about German orthodontic fetishists finding my blog is going to air on the CBC Radio One (102.5 FM in Saskatchewan) show SoundXchange this Saturday, September 6, 5 to 6 p.m. Saskatchewan time.

The monologue will be read by the host and will appear later on in the show, about 5:45 p.m. CBC is also going to link to this blog on the SoundXchange website.

For those of you not in Saskatchewan, there will be a live stream of the program on the show's website.

Please tune in if you get a chance!

Reader experience: Chronic pain and arthritis

noreply@blogger.com (Bella) — Mon, 01 Sep 2008 16:51:00 +0000

A few weeks ago, I got a comment on a post from someone who had lower mandibular advancement surgery 15 years ago in the same city I had mine, and is now having problems with pain and arthritis. I'm posting the comment here, so everyone can read it, as it's important to show all sides of this surgery, not just the positive results.

[I am not sure if this person had the BSSO surgery or the older version of it, and I don't know how much surgical procedures have changed in the past 15 years. I'm hoping there are less problems with newer procedures. Does anyone have information on this?]

Working From Home Today has left a new comment on your post "Three weeks ago, something cool happened":

Hi Smiling Bella,

I had jaw advancement surgery back in 1993 in SK. I wish I could say differently, but my story is not positive. Keep in mind that I don't think it's this way for everyone.

I did experience nerve damage from the surgery, I still can't feel the half of my lower lip. But that's a minor discomfort and if it were the only side effect, I wouldn't sweat it much.

The bad part for me is that over the last 15 years, my jaw has experienced severe deterioration. It's cost me thousands of dollars to be diagnosed and treated. I recently got to see Toronto's best expert on the subject. She was so amazing, so knowledgeable. After lots of testing, the diagnosis is that I will experience severe arthritis for the rest of my life. I have one more bone scan to see if it will get worse as I age. Fingers crossed, it won't. The kicker is, of course, the associated pain.

I've been prescribed industrial-strength pain relievers but I don't like the side effects. I take them only on the very bad days, about once a week and no more. The rest of the time I rely on my hard mouth splint, Shiatsu and exercise. It all helps immensely. I owe so much to the experts I've found.

I am guessing it's not like this for everyone. But I honestly don't know what I would say to people contemplating this surgery. I'm still so angry about it. I can't wait to go back to SK, where I fully intend to take my scans and MRIs into the office of the oral surgeon who conducted my original surgery. It's a conversation we need to have.

Of course, I can't prove the damage is related to the initial surgery because, as I'm told repeated by the country's best experts, adequate long term studies have never been done.

My firm belief now is that this one of the most complex joints in the human body. It should not be handled by orthodontists.

Meanwhile, I look forward to reading your blog. I suspect I'll find some excellent advice. Congrats on your braces!

Reality check

noreply@blogger.com (Bella) — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 04:27:00 +0000

I have been feeling cruddy this past while, exhausted and weak, generally run down. When I start to feel sick, my jaw pain tends to act up as well. I didn't really pay much attention to it in the past, but thinking back on it, this has been happening for the past few years.

I feel tired and run down, my jaw tenses up, I get a debilitating headache and can't go to work and do my job. More unpaid sick leave for Bella. Hooray.

Today, I got high on codeine to take the edge off the jaw migraines triggered by the overall cruddiness, spent the day in bed and went to see my physiotherapist late afternoon for my weekly appointment.

She asked how I was doing, so I told her, mentioning that I felt like some allergies were being aggravated or that I was coming down with a cold and that my jaw acted up whenever I felt this way.

She told me that when an area of your body is in pain for a long period of time and the condition becomes chronic, as my jaw likely has, the area grows extra nerve endings and becomes sensitive to histamines. So, if you do have allergies or are coming down with a cold, the pain in that area will flare up.

The news hit me kind of hard. I realized that I have been in pain for the past three years, and, as a result, this is something that I will probably have to deal with for the rest of my life, surgery or not.

In the spring when the snow melts and the mold underneath the banks starts swirling around, during cold and flu season, on windy days...I'm going to feel sucky. My jaw is going to act up. I am going to get horrible headaches, and I probably won't be able to go to work.

While I don't regret the surgery, and I believe that it has improved my quality of life (chewing, talking and singing) and saved my jaw from more damage in the future, the damage was already done before I went under the bone saw. And I'm going to have to live with that. And figure out how to deal with it.

Anyone have any thoughts on how to handle this situation going forward? (That don't involve allergy drugs, because those aggravate other health conditions I have.)

Ask Bella: Always wear protection

noreply@blogger.com (Bella) — Wed, 27 Aug 2008 00:26:00 +0000

Q: I broke my jaw in three places by falling and landing jaw first on a concrete step. I had surgery immediately after the accident, which resulted in two titanium rods being inserted either side of my chin. I also broke some of my teeth in the fall. I had my mouth wired during the surgery and shut with elastics. I went to see my specialist and he removed the elastics after only 12 days. I still, however, have all the wires in for another four weeks.

The main problem is that my bite is miles from being where it should be. At the moment, only my teeth at the back touch. I am hoping that the jaw will loosen over the next few weeks and may improve my bite, however I'm not very optimistic that it will improve very much.

Would you have any advice here? It looks like I will need the help of a dentist/orthodontist to sort me out!

A: I cringed when I read your story - that must have been so painful.

I'm no expert, but I'm guessing you'll need some orthodontic help to get your bite in order. I was wired with wires and elastics over top for two weeks as well. My surgeon told me that the elastics were there to help level the bite while the jaw was healing, so there would be less work for my orthodontist to do.

Your elastics were likely there to do the same, so if your teeth aren't touching at the front, that means more would need to be done. I hope that everything works out for you.

A friend of mine was telling me about a guy he knew who fell off his bike and broke his jaw. After everything I've been through with my surgery, I'm considering getting one of those full-face bike helmets (here's an example of what they look like: http://www.mec.ca/Products/product_detail.jsp?PRODUCT%3C%3Eprd_id=845524442621427&FOLDER%3C%3Efolder_id=2534374302693161&bmUID=1215389828047) so that if I fall, my jaw, as well as my brain will be protected. Hey, a gal can never be too careful.

Good luck with everything - I hope the rest of your recovery is a smooth one.

*To ask Bella a question about her jaw surgery, email her at smilingbella at gmail dot com or leave a comment on this post. Go ahead: ask away!!

Brace-free and fabulous

noreply@blogger.com (Bella) — Thu, 21 Aug 2008 04:10:00 +0000

I promised brace-free pictures, and I like to keep my promises, so here you go:

I am now officially at six months post-surgery, though I had my braces taken off at the five month mark (a record for my orthodontist, who says he's never had a surgical patient's braces taken off that quickly.)

I still have to have some dental work done, though. There are large spaces between some of my top teeth, common after this kind of surgery, that I have to get filled in by my dentist next month.

So, we're getting there. By the end of this year, I figure everything - jaw opening, chin numbness, tooth spaces - will be taken care of, and I can finally move past this phase of my life.

High...um...I mean "hi"

noreply@blogger.com (Bella) — Wed, 20 Aug 2008 02:23:00 +0000

The last time I went to see The Jaw Master Grand Pouba of Physiotherapy with Thumbs of Steel, he put me through so much pain that I was gasping for air, crying, and doing Lamaze breathing to get through the appointment.

I wanted to hate him and swear I would never go back, but the dude's effective - he got my mouth opening from 30 mm to 36 mm in one session.

So, I just swore. A lot.

It takes months to get in with him, which gave me time to psych myself up for round number two. I decided that there was no way I was going into my next session sober. I was going to get very, very high on painkillers first. Fortunately, it doesn't take much to impair my brain function, which made me wonder a bit about the stability of my brain function, a thought that quickly disappeared with two T3s (codeine) taken in the waiting room before my appointment.

By the time they called me in, I was flying. An intern was the first one to see me.

Intern: The Jaw Master Grand Pouba of Physiotherapy with Thumbs of Steel is running a bit late, so I'm here to get you started. How are you doing today?
Bella: I'm doing GREAT!!
Intern: You certainly are chipper today.
Bella: I'm high. He's mean, so I had to get high so I wouldn't have to breathe like I'm giving birth, not that I know what it's like to give birth or anything, but yeah.
Intern: Uh...okay.
Bella: He makes me cry when he uses his Thumbs of Steel.
Intern: I have heard that before, actually. Though I don't know anyone else who had to get high before they saw him.
Bella: I'm special.
Intern: Yes, I can see that.
Bella: Codeine is goooooood.

By the time The Jaw Master Grand Pouba of Physiotherapy with Thumbs of Steel came in, I was even more far gone.

Bella: German orthodontic fetishists like me, you know.
Jaw Master Grand Pouba of Physiotherapy with Thumbs of Steel: [puts Thumbs of Steel in Bella's mouth and pries her jaw open]
Bella: You're mean. Codeine sucks!!
Jaw Master Grant Pouba of Physiotherapy with Thumbs of Steel: [cranks Bella's mouth even farther] Feel that? That's the end of your range of motion. Your mouth won't ever open farther than this because this is how far the bones will let me go. Let's just hold it here for a bit and measure it so we can see where we're at.
Bella: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Then I said a bunch of other weird incoherent stuff I don't really remember and accused him of various human rights abuses. All I know is that they were pretty amused by my altered state.

However, in the end, I discovered that the end of my range of motion is about 47 mm, and in our session, he was able to get me from 42 mm to 44 mm, so I'm pretty much there. By the end of the year, my jaw physiotherapy torture sessions will be a distant, painful memory.

The next time I see him is in December. Hmmm...I'm pretty sure I have some liquid hydromorphone left over from my surgery...

Ask Bella: Nausea and eating post-surgery

noreply@blogger.com (Bella) — Sun, 17 Aug 2008 00:21:00 +0000

Q: I just had upper and lower jaw surgery and some genioplasty. I'm so relieved I found your website. It has truly been helpful in answering some of my questions and it's good to know that there is someone else out there that has had the same problems as me. I do have a question for you though. What was the easiest way for you to eat anything the first couple days? It's frustrating. Also, did you have nausea and, if so, what helped?

A: I didn't have nausea right after the surgery, but I did purchase some children's liquid Gravol just in case. It came in handy a bit later on when some of the drugs made me a little nauseated. I just took some by syringe and it also helped me sleep, which was really handy, too.

The easiest way to eat anything the first few days was by syringe/tube. In the hospital, I got quite good at loading the syringe up with liquid food and shooting it into the side of my mouth. If you're eating soups or other things like that, make sure you strain it or it will get stuck in your wires. I had problems with that but for some reason stubbornly refused to strain my soups, even though that would have solved everything. I blame the drugs.

After a few days, I graduated to the Zip 'n' Squeeze bags, which made eating go a bit faster because you can fit more in the bags than you can in a syringe.

It is so frustrating to eat, because it takes so long - I feel you there. Try to cram as many calories into your food as possible. Use whole milk with extra skim milk powder in it, put whipped cream in your hot chocolate, that kind of thing, so that whatever you manage to get past your wires packs a good punch.

Best of luck to you. I know exactly how you feel. Just hang in there and keep telling yourself, "This will all be over soon."

*To ask Bella a question about her jaw surgery, email her at smilingbella at gmail dot com or leave a comment on this post. Go ahead: ask away!!

Bad vibrations

noreply@blogger.com (Bella) — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 07:37:00 +0000

I'm a big fan of live music and shows, when I'm feeling well enough to go, that is. Since my surgery, I've only had the chance to go to two performances (a burlesque show and an outdoor folk festival), and I'm beginning to see a pattern emerge that concerns me a little. It's only a hypothesis at this point, but I'm curious to know if anyone else has had a similar experience.

When I go to live shows, I carry a pair of ear plugs in my purse. That way, if the sound system is too loud, I can take the edge off instead of getting a nasty headache from the noise. (You know you're getting old when...)

Anyway, I had my earplugs at the ready but was surprised when it wasn't the noise that bothered me this time; it was the bass.

I was enjoying myself at first, but as each of the shows went on, it felt as though the vibrations of the heavy bass guitar were reverberating through the speakers and straight into my jaw. They then travelled up the sides of my face, causing me to get a splitting headache and leave early.

My hypothesis is that the heavy bass is vibrating the screws left in my jaw from the jaw surgery, which irritates the healing bone and gives me a headache. The area where the screws are located seems to be the focus of the initial discomfort, before it spreads into a full-blown headache.

Has anyone else experienced this? I wonder if it goes away once the bone is totally healed, or if this is what I can expect anytime I go to a show for the rest of my life?

I really hope not. Because earplugs are a simple solution to loud music that hurts your ears. But what's the solution to music that vibrates your jaw screws?

Three weeks ago, something cool happened

noreply@blogger.com (Bella) — Sat, 09 Aug 2008 18:53:00 +0000

It's hard to believe that it's been three weeks already and I haven't written about this. But that was part of the plan. Not to write about it. To have something that was just mine, that wasn't a status update on Facebook, that wasn't Twittered, that wasn't mentioned on one of my blogs. Something special. Something that could actually be a surprise.

And man, was it a hard secret to keep. I have a big mouth, and this is something that has to do with my mouth, so it was even more difficult to shut up about, so to speak.

Three weeks ago today, I went to see my orthodontist for a ten-minute check-up. He just wanted to see how my teeth were progressing so we could talk about the potential of getting my braces off in the next month or so.

He looked at my teeth and said, "They're perfect. Take them off!"

I looked at him, puzzled. "So, I should make an appointment to get the braces taken off, then?"

He said, "No. Take them off now."

"You mean, right now?" I asked, incredulously.

"Yes."

"But I don't even have my camera with me!" I cried.

I am such a blogger, jeez.

Next thing you know, they're coming at me with pliers and a drill. Two hours later, I was brace-free and grinning ear to ear. I'm sure the grinning had nothing to do with all the painkillers I downed before I'd let them come at me with the pliers and drill.

So, what was the first thing I did with my new metalless mouth? Well, I didn't eat corn on the cob, like I had originally planned, because the lady with the pliers told me that I should wait for my teeth to settle into the bone more - she was worried that eating anything too hard would pull them out of alignment. I couldn't argue with her on that one, because once you've gone through everything that I have, you don't want to take any chances.

I don't remember what I ate, but I do know how awesome it was to brush my teeth for the first time without all that metal in my mouth. It was so...easy. Brushing your teeth is awesome! The brush feels so good against your teeth and gums. I don't know why we don't do it all the time, like for fun:

Imaginary friend in alternate universe where teeth brushing is uber cool: Hey Bella, what do you want to do this weekend? Live music, hanging at the pub, going to a movie?
Bella: Why don't we all get together and brush our teeth?
Imaginary friend: Why didn't I think of that? That's the Best Idea Ever!
Bella: And get this, after we brush, we are totally going to floss!
Imaginary friend: Hooray!!

And flossing! Oh, my, flossing! Why did I ever not floss before? It's practically effortless. Just glide that string between my nicely spaced teeth and I'm done in a few seconds. People who have never had braces don't understand how awesome flossing is. Once you have to maneuver around wires and brackets for a few years, you want to do it all the time when it's easy again.

After all the gratuitous oral hygiene, I did something that I've wanted to do for the past year and a half. I told my boyfriend that I had something important to show him and that he had to come over right away.

Once he walked in the door, I kissed him.

You see, the entire time we've been together, I've had braces, so I didn't know what it was like to kiss him without them. A year and a half is a long time to wait for that kind of thing.

And I must say it was worth the wait. The boyfriend is a very good kisser, even better when he doesn't have to worry about my wires digging into my lips.

As for my other friends, I didn't post my news online because I wanted to show them myself. I thought they would just notice right away, but none of them did. I had to resort to staring at them and grinning like a maniac until their fight or flight instinct kicked their brains into high gear and they exclaimed, "Oh, you got your braces off!"

Yes, yes I did. Thanks for noticing.

Ask Bella: Nerve damage and chin numbness

noreply@blogger.com (Bella) — Sun, 03 Aug 2008 02:29:00 +0000

Q: It's such a scary thing to anticipate putting oneself through such a major procedure, and I must say I also find the prospect of permanent nerve damage terrifying. Thanks for sharing your experiences with acupuncture, as that gives me some hope that things can be done afterwards to help! I just wanted to ask: Are you still having improvements in recovering sensation in your lower face?

A: With the chin/lip numbness, I notice an improvement every single day. It's amazing, really. After the surgery, I noticed the numbness starting to go away alongside the swelling. At the two week post-op point, I would say I had about 85% of my feeling back. The return of feeling each day was very noticeable at that point.

Now that I'm at about 99% of feeling back, the return is more subtle. Instead of getting back 5% a day, it's .05% a day (or some other microscopic amount. I'm into words, not numbers, so please excuse my lack of accurate mathematical estimates.) But I notice it everyday, particularly after acupuncture or one of those home microdermabrasion facials. What a great excuse for a facial!! Anyway, I'm fully confident that I'll have total feeling back by the end of this year at the latest. I'll keep everyone posted on my blog, but I know it will happen.

*To ask Bella a question about her jaw surgery, email her at smilingbella at gmail dot com or leave a comment on this post. Go ahead: ask away!!

Ask Bella: Acupuncture

noreply@blogger.com (Bella) — Thu, 31 Jul 2008 02:45:00 +0000

Q: I've never had accupuncture before and am scared of the little needles. But I am tempted to try it, after having read your website. Would you strongly recommend it for the numbness? I also had a genioplasty (where they take your chin bone and slide it out forward to create more of a chin), and I can't even remotely feel ANY sensation in my chin. Which is, apparently, normal. But if I can speed up the process of the numbness going away, I'd love to do it. I'm just a little scared.

A: The first time I had acupuncture, I was scared, too. But it doesn't hurt that much, if at all. I mean, think about everything you've been through so far - do you really think acupuncture with its teensy little needles will ever compare to having a bone saw taken to your face? After what you've been through, you can handle anything!!

Also, some naturopaths or physiotherapists do it, which means you might be able to find someone who can help you with all of your post-surgery recovery needs. It's important to find an acupuncturist you can communicate well with. I've had some excellent acupuncturists who could barely speak English. They were great at what they did, but it was difficult to understand them, so if you had any questions or wanted them to explain what they're doing to you, you were out of luck. If you haven't had it done before, keep that in mind!

I did notice a big change in the numbness after I started going to acupuncture. Everyone's different, but it really helped me.

*To ask Bella a question about her jaw surgery, email her at smilingbella at gmail dot com or leave a comment on this post. Go ahead: ask away!!

Ask Bella: Lymph drainage massage

noreply@blogger.com (Bella) — Tue, 29 Jul 2008 03:05:00 +0000

Q: I was considering a lymph drainage massage, but my oral surgeon said, "I have no idea what that is, so I don't know if it's a good idea." But you did have one, and you said you noticed a difference, correct? Was it at all uncomfortable? And would you recommend it?

A: Lymph drainage is very gentle - like a butterfly touch - and it drains the swelling like crazy. I couldn't believe how effective it is, particularly because the guy "massaging" my face barely touched me. It made such a huge difference.

The only regret I had was that I should have gone the day after the surgery instead of waiting two weeks. I was very swollen and lopsided from the swelling, and after one session I noticed a huge difference. The homeopathic remedy Arnica is great for helping to reduce swelling, too, and you can find it at most health food stores.

It sounds like your surgeon is pretty traditional. Some doctors are strictly medicine/surgery, while others are more open to complementary medicine and alternatives.

Just so you know, all of the remedies and treatments I have used post-surgery are things that have been used by many other people who have gone through the same surgery - just check the online jaw surgery support groups found in my sidebar for examples of others who have done the same. (That being said, please consult with your surgeon or doctor before taking any supplements or natural remedies.)

*To ask Bella a question about her jaw surgery, email her at smilingbella at gmail dot com or leave a comment on this post. Go ahead: ask away!!